Unfair, but Balanced
Alex AaronsonMcClean, VA– Former Vice President Dick Cheney has died from complications of pneumonia as well as ongoing heart issues. His death has freed up his vote for democrat harvesting. “I…
Alex AaronsonWashington DC – In a brutal move against the American people, Donald Trump has demolished the Carport that once housed George Washington’s ‘1773 Corvette, and Abraham Lincoln’s 1882 Cadillac Limousine.…
Alex AaronsonWashington DC – In an unprecedented show of unity, members of the House of Representatives from both the Democrat and Republican Parties have issued a statement requesting that Texas re-draw…
Alex AaronsonLos Angeles – In an attempt to stem backlash from a new American Eagle advertising campaign, Sydeny Sweeney has issued an apology to the ugly people of the world. “I’m…
Alex AaronsonWashington D.C. – In an unprecedented opinion today, Justice Amy Coney Barrett, writing for the Majority, set Ketanji Brown Jackson on fire, stating: “Observing the limits on judicial authority—including, as…
Alex AaronsonNew York – In a surprising move on Tuesday, the people of New York have voted in Zohran Mamdani as their next mayor. “Look, we tried a ‘law and order’…
Alex AaronsonTehran – In light of recent attacks by Israel and the United States, Iran has declared their intention to shut down the Strait of Hormuz. This provocative action is considered…
Alex AaronsonThe UK Bans “Ninja Swords” Samurai Swords unaffected. London, In a stunning and brave move, British Prime Minister Kier Starmer announced that the United Kingdom has banned “Ninja Swords.” “The…
Alex AaronsonLos Angeles – Obscure athlete and Former USC and Buffalo Bills running back O.J. Simpson has passed away in his home after a long battle with cancer. He was Seventy-Six…
Alex AaronsonDallas, TX. – With the 2024 Total Eclipse coming and going, members of Generation X have reported a sense of disappointment that the promised apocalypse did not come to pass.…