Dallas, TX. – With the 2024 Total Eclipse coming and going, members of Generation X have reported a sense of disappointment that the promised apocalypse did not come to pass.

“I mean, I was sitting in traffic this morning on the way to the office and I thought; ‘Oh, hey! This is the last time I’ll make this soul crushing commute,”’ said Dallas resident Brian Smith. “But then, no. We emerged from the shadow of the moon, and I still had to make it to that staff meeting and listen to that asshole Steven give a presentation on Q3 Predictions. Oh well,” he could be heard muttering “whatever… never mind,” as he walked back to his cubicle.